Outlook Good

Those asses at Mattel have dismantled and destroyed my virtual Magic 8 Ball, so I have transferred my allegiance to the Magic Infinity Ball. This particular ball seems to offer accurate information, at any rate. The Magic 8 Ball had me incensed at every turn, with its “Outlook not so good,” “Cannot predict now,” “No,” and so forth. The Magic Infinity Ball uses those responses as well, but with healthy moderation. Given the testimonial I’ve provided here, no reasonable man would continue to use Mattel revelation technology in any of its forms.