Clarification

Would I die for Boris Johnson? Not if given a choice in the matter. But let that not cloud your thinking: I love Boris Johnson so much that I would hide him at the farm with Lord Lucan if he needed to "disappear."

He needn't hang out with Lucan; that might make him jumpy. Lucan likes the dairy barn, anyway. Boris can have the house. The house has wi-fi and a few of those Farrah Fawcett posters.