This Morning
When I woke up this morning, I noticed that everything outside was coated with a thin layer of human skin, complete with downy hairs and a few unsightly moles. I could barely believe my eyes. So I put on my glasses and looked again, and boy, was I relieved. It was just ice! Why the ice was hairy and mole-ridden, I’ll never know. I walked to work with the only footwear known to navigate ice with any semblance of safety or dignity: Chuck Norris Converse All-Stars. They didn’t really match my sailor outfit, but I always put safety first. I killed several motorists with my martial arts ice-maneuvering mastery. I also got to work on time. Things are looking up.
4 Comments:
I'm using Safari browser, so now I can comment on your fine blog once more. Alas, I have nothing tosay that has not already been better said by William Shakespeare. Therefore I must refer you to his "compleat workes".
- www.stephenesque.org
Excellent!
Isn't William Shakespeare that guy from Knots Landing? Because I was never impressed with the things he said. I've heard that TV shows had writers back then, so maybe he's not to blame for his ridiculous dialogue and suity piffery.
Wait. I thought Shakespeare was the lead singer of Los Lobos.
Los Lobos is a nuclear testing facility in New Mexico. Have you tried those Christmas Cookie Cutout Peeps or what? You're running out of time, brother.
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