I Wonder Why People Bother

Sometimes I wonder why people bother having coughing fits in public. It sounds terrible and accomplishes very little. In practical terms, it would be more efficient to run in circles, squawking like a sea gull at a barbecue. Better yet, why not fight someone for their bread crust, then fly off and poop on some windshields?

But no, people would rather just stand there and cough in my face for two full minutes, the animals.