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Monday, December 05, 2005

My Chef d'Oeuvre by Esther Wilberforce-Packard

I've spent the past 4 years writing a fantastic Swedish folktale. It takes place on gentle rolling hills of south-central Minnesota in 1890. Gertie and Albert are Swedes. "This is the story of two Swedes, picked to live in a house and have their lives taped, to see what happens when people stop being polite, and start poisoning each other with something from a can." This is their folktale, a play in one act. Four years of my life! Finally, it's perfect enough for print.

Alarum. Enter Gertie and Albert.

Gertie: Drink this, yah? (hands can to Albert)

Albert: (drinks from can) Good drink! (finishes can)

Gertie: It's poison, yah.

Albert: POISON?! (stunned, drops can)

Gertie: Ooooh, yah. Poison.

Albert: Will I die?

Gertie: Yah. Real soon.



Blogger Chris Cope said...

Oh yah, dat's a pretty good li'l play ya got der.

7:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

excuse me ma'am is this a comment on my current string of absenteeism - anyway you owe me 7 years of back christmas bonus pay!

11:44 AM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

For a one-act play, it's a little long. I suppose a good editor could tighten it up, though, if you are interested in a quick sale. Or, you could do it yourself. Just eliminate all the foreplay.

12:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

too bad he didn't know lutefisk was the antedote.

6:11 PM  
Blogger Chemical Billy said...

Eliminate the foreplay, and insert an entr'acte. It always works for me.

4:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Rather than an entr'act, I suggest you extract the Yahs. Then move the play to Rio, and use the Ipanima girl as the main character. She can poison the other one while walking by.

12:50 PM  

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