Answer Time: I Cannot Disprove a Single Strike Against Me

Several people have written to me with their questions. I will answer three of the most commonly asked questions now, because I don't know what else to do with them.

#1 "Are you the same Esther Wilberforce-Packard who passed the deadly typhoid on to 23,000 people on the east coast decades ago?" No! You are thinking of someone else, and I'm not Irish.

#2 "Who lays track faster, Big Joe Weems Or Tarheel Roy?" Why, Tarheel Roy, of course! But Big Joe Weems has a kind heart, and I'll take that over superior track-laying speed any day!

#3 "May I please have an EWP signed photo or an extra-large t-shirt? It's for my sister." I'm sorry, your sister sounds very nice, but I am not able to accommodate you at this time, for I have no secretary. I no longer manufacture the EWP t-shirt because my Taipei factory burned to the ground (note to self: investigate! Why do all my garment factories burn down?!?) As far as the signed photo goes, no. I can't send out photos either, for the same reason given above, but you can look at this charming photo taken of us at the office today. I'm the pretty one on the right.