Allow Me to Make Myself Quite Clear

Like many people, I prefer my hard-shell tacos whole and unbroken, free of shell fragments and corn-based detritus. It is not my style to dine on quasi-nachos when only a taco will do. It is only a matter of form, some might argue; tousle a taco and you have nachos – pat nachos into a half moon and you have a taco. What it really comes down to is style. I agree with these pragmatists, up to a point. Yes, taco and nacho ingredients are similar, if not identical, but form before function, that's what I always say. Style before substance, I always say. Furthermore, toads ought to wear tailored clothing and drive automobiles about the countryside. I know toads enjoy this freedom in Europe, perhaps even in "Old Europe," but do they exercise their sartorial and automotive rights here in America? I’ve never seen clothed toads motoring in Minnesota, but perhaps they cleave to the climate and culture of the South. I know I do. Faulkner said it best, I do think: "Why, that's a hundred miles away. That's a long way to go just to eat." Which inevitably directs us back to the broken taco conundrum.