I would have blogged sooner, but I've been studying pupilometrics. Pupilometrics: the study of the black eye dot. Not everyone has a black eye dot - you have to have eyeballs first. If you are without eyeballs, you are likely without pupils. What I'm saying is this: pupilometrics is a very complex area of study. Pupilometrics is what happens when pupils "puporate" in the presence of visuals. I have reached an advanced state of knowledge of pupilometrics in a matter of minutes by utilizing a specialized "soak strategy" wherein I actually puporate the pupilometrics textbook. It's like speed reading, but faster. I would like to tell you more about this exciting science, but I have to be at city hall in five minutes; the mayor is microwaving me a burrito.