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Monday, May 08, 2006

I Was Born In Diet Pepsi, and I'll Die in Diet Pepsi

I just made up a new language. It's called Z-Drippy, and it will be the official language of my new nation-state, Diet Pepsi. Diet Pepsi will officially exist as soon as I can get PepsiCo to sign some paperwork. In the meantime, why not learn a few phrases? And because body language is 70% of communication, I've included some rudimentary gestures to help you along:

Where is the toilet?
Z-drippy toilet? (cup crotch with both hands, hop from one foot to the other)

Can I exchange money here?
Z-drippy money? (squint, pound fist on table)

How long will my flight be delayed?
Z-drippy delay? Delay? Delay? (flare nostrils rapidly)

I need a doctor. I have a sliver in my foot.
Z-drippy sliver? (sit quickly, remove shoe, point to foot)

I would like a double room.
Z-drippy DOUBLE ROOM. (jab index finger into receptionist's lapel)

How do I get to the beach?
Z-drippy beach? (smell hand with keen interest)

I'll have the salmon corn cakes.
Z-drippy! (point to item on menu)

I'm an American.
Z-drippy? (point to self, bare lower teeth only)

I'd like a cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi.
Z-drippy cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi. (rest forehead on table)

5 Comments:

Blogger HA HA HA said...

ur makign this up.

11:54 PM  
Blogger goldennib said...

Can I come to your country if I drink Diet Coke?

5:20 AM  
Blogger bryan torre said...

Sometimes one runs across a post about which nothing can be said. I believe this post may qualify.
Then again, Old Horsetail Snake may prove me wrong ("Z-drippy snake?")

6:17 PM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

Z-Drippy in Z-drippy, you've clearly stolen your language off the Welsh:

Welsh: "Dw i eisiau cwrw."
"Your" language: "Z-drippy booze."

See? It's a blatant rip-off.

10:58 AM  
Anonymous adolfo velasquez said...

How tall is your dentist?

Z-Drippy the dentist? (pointing at the person and back to yourself, then nod and smile knowingly.)

Can I have that sandwich?

Z-Drippy my tummy? (curl fingers and make clawing gestures toward the other person's eyes.)

5:21 PM  

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