I Was Born In Diet Pepsi, and I'll Die in Diet Pepsi
I just made up a new language. It's called Z-Drippy, and it will be the official language of my new nation-state, Diet Pepsi. Diet Pepsi will officially exist as soon as I can get PepsiCo to sign some paperwork. In the meantime, why not learn a few phrases? And because body language is 70% of communication, I've included some rudimentary gestures to help you along:
Where is the toilet?
Z-drippy toilet? (cup crotch with both hands, hop from one foot to the other)
Can I exchange money here?
Z-drippy money? (squint, pound fist on table)
How long will my flight be delayed?
Z-drippy delay? Delay? Delay? (flare nostrils rapidly)
I need a doctor. I have a sliver in my foot.
Z-drippy sliver? (sit quickly, remove shoe, point to foot)
I would like a double room.
Z-drippy DOUBLE ROOM. (jab index finger into receptionist's lapel)
How do I get to the beach?
Z-drippy beach? (smell hand with keen interest)
I'll have the salmon corn cakes.
Z-drippy! (point to item on menu)
I'm an American.
Z-drippy? (point to self, bare lower teeth only)
I'd like a cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi.
Z-drippy cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi. (rest forehead on table)
Where is the toilet?
Z-drippy toilet? (cup crotch with both hands, hop from one foot to the other)
Can I exchange money here?
Z-drippy money? (squint, pound fist on table)
How long will my flight be delayed?
Z-drippy delay? Delay? Delay? (flare nostrils rapidly)
I need a doctor. I have a sliver in my foot.
Z-drippy sliver? (sit quickly, remove shoe, point to foot)
I would like a double room.
Z-drippy DOUBLE ROOM. (jab index finger into receptionist's lapel)
How do I get to the beach?
Z-drippy beach? (smell hand with keen interest)
I'll have the salmon corn cakes.
Z-drippy! (point to item on menu)
I'm an American.
Z-drippy? (point to self, bare lower teeth only)
I'd like a cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi.
Z-drippy cool, refreshing Diet Pepsi. (rest forehead on table)
5 Comments:
ur makign this up.
Can I come to your country if I drink Diet Coke?
Sometimes one runs across a post about which nothing can be said. I believe this post may qualify.
Then again, Old Horsetail Snake may prove me wrong ("Z-drippy snake?")
Z-Drippy in Z-drippy, you've clearly stolen your language off the Welsh:
Welsh: "Dw i eisiau cwrw."
"Your" language: "Z-drippy booze."
See? It's a blatant rip-off.
How tall is your dentist?
Z-Drippy the dentist? (pointing at the person and back to yourself, then nod and smile knowingly.)
Can I have that sandwich?
Z-Drippy my tummy? (curl fingers and make clawing gestures toward the other person's eyes.)
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