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Friday, November 11, 2005

I Won't Rest Until I Know What It's Called

What is this thing I'm thinking of? I don't know what it's called, so I can't google it. It has a metal thing, and a thing that rolls on that thing forever with a magnet. The thing that rolls on the thing goes all the way one way, them all the way the other way. You're supposed to just stand there, hold the thing handle (which is part of the thing but lower) and watch the thing that rolls go from one end to the other. It's a toy. It's not even fun.

Hold on, I'll try to draw it.

Well, what is it? I won't rest until I know what it's called.

And since we're in the neighborhood, what it this?

Just kidding, I made this one up.
The idea is, if you eat what's in the jar, you can fly. And no, they're not drugs - they're olives. And they're delicious.

Coming Next Week: If you eat what's in the buffet, you die. And no, it's not drugs - it's chicken kiev that's been kept at room temperature for 36 hours.


Blogger Shane said...

It's called a Thing.
Olives is an anagram of So Vile. I think that's apt.

Sorry, Esther, but I was feeling rebellious today. I just had to cut loose and diss your olives. It won't happen again.

8:33 AM  
Blogger Esther Wilberforce-Packard said...

They're not even real olives - they're little graphite circles. If you want to be rebellious, why not buy a Buddy Holly record and grease your hair back? You can drive your motorcycle to the sock hop. But don't go inside! Stand outside and smoke cigarettes.

8:46 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's not called a Thing, it's called Something Else. But I can't remember what that is exactly.

Never eat the chicken kiev. Never.

9:16 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A Buddy Holly record does not rebellious make. You need an entertainer whose hips have broken free of their moorings... like an Elvis, or a Charo.

10:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Igmar is drunk.

"In his horn-rimmed glasses, there was little chance that Buddy Holly would have been mistaken for a heartthrob - yet he remains one of the first rebel voices of youth."

Some people will use any excuse to drag Elvis into a conversation.

11:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Googling gyroscope wheel rail led me to

11:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...



11:54 AM  
Blogger Jenny said...

1. HI

2. Muzik sent me.

3. My hubby says it's called a "Wonder Wheel."

Great drawings!

11:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It is a sketch of a Wheelo.

The jingle went something like this:

Its Wheelo, its Wheelo,
for fun its a wonderful toy.
Everyone loves a Wheelo!

12:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you quite sure it’s a toy? It looks suspiciously like a device developed buy Victorian age spiritualists for the purpose of massaging poltergeists. The theory seems to have been that relaxed poltergeists would be more likely to nap than to break things. But really, how could one slather a poltergeist with warm cinnamon scented massage oil. Silly Victorians.

12:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Slinky company later stole that jingle by the way...

12:18 PM  
Blogger Arethusa said...

Oh they did! I was about to say that I thought that was slinky. What's a wheelo exactly? I mean I know that there's the post and the drawing...but I still don't get it.

Funny post and art though. Hi Esther, Muzikdude sent me!

12:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you have a fat pencil

3:25 PM  
Blogger keithurbanchic said...

I had a Wheel-O, if in fact that is it's true name. Wheel-O hypnotised me for hours because it came with paper spirals you could fit onto the sides of Wheel-O, and when Wheel-O did his stuff the colors on the spirals would be different in motion than when they weres still.

Or maybe that was just the warm Chicken Kiev kicking in . . .

3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


you have a phat pencil.

4:09 PM  
Blogger Esther Wilberforce-Packard said...

Arethusa - What can I say? You stand there grasping the handle while the wheel goes woooOOOOOoooo, woooOOOOOoooo, woooOOOOOOoooo, etc.

Tremendous fun for morose children who like to stand still and focus on limited, repetitive motion.

4:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh- I like those things! They're fun, in a mindless sort of way. Wheelo, huh? Hmmm- I'm going to go google that. But first, let me say hello! This is a nice place you have here, despite the Chicken Kiev.I think I'll prowl arounda bit. I came via Muzik's- he's such a nice guy!

5:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

and you're mary tyler moore...

8:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have no idea if this will display.


It might i suppose,
then again ... it might not.

John :)

8:39 PM  
Blogger birdwoman said...

1) muzikdude sent me
2) I know what this thing is, but didn't realize it had a name. Thing is taken, though, by the Aadams' disembodied hand... thingamajig might be free
3) as for slinky "stealing" - there's nothing new under the sun. I'm sure wheelo stole it, also.


7:40 AM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

But let's not forget the point made by a Wheelo. It was pointless. But you could do it for a long time.

9:00 AM  
Blogger Babette said...

Those olives are tasty in a dry martini. Muzik sent me. He has discriminating taste, indeed!

11:23 AM  
Blogger Afe said...

I believe that is a ham.

6:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh dang it! I knew what it is, but I couldn't name it! Oh, Muzik sent me! Love the drawings.

9:32 PM  
Blogger Catez said...

Hi Esther,
1. No-one sent me. I don't know where I am.
2. I say a thing like that in a photo from a Raelian manual. They use it for making icecream.

10:08 PM  
Blogger Esther Wilberforce-Packard said...

Do raelians make ice cream? Or… does ice cream make raelians?


I’m sorry, did that not blow your mind?

9:38 AM  
Blogger Müzikdüde said...

Raelians create ice cream...and vice versa.

You didn't blow my mind but I may need a new tire on the driver side, rear.

8:59 AM  
Blogger Judy said...

Muzik sent me - congrats on being the mystery site of the week!

10:37 AM  
Blogger Arethusa said...

Oh I get it now. Pointlessness can be very exciting if you do it right. I don't know if a wheelo could fit that description but it is possible.

I saw the leader of the Raelians at Pearson airport once! I thought he was planning to attend a Star Wars convention.

11:53 AM  
Blogger Arethusa said...

To be clearer, I thought he was planning to attend such a convention, because of his outlandish outfit. Very white, very big and...puffed up around the shoulders.

11:54 AM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

Wonder Wheel was the thing that Richard Pryor accidentally deflated in "The Toy."

"Don't die on me Wonder Wheel! After all we've been through!"

12:17 PM  
Blogger Catez said...

"Do raelians make ice cream? Or… does ice cream make raelians?


I’m sorry, did that not blow your mind?"



I'm never going to eat genetically modified icecream again. Except chocolate ripple. What could happen - Raelian streaks? If it goes horribly wrong I'll eat the chicken kiev.

2:58 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My elementary school art teacher called a thing like that a "magnetic yoyo". I think I've heard it elsewhere as well.
This is the best blog ever by the way. I'm glad I found it whilst googling "colonel yam".

9:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh to larf - a device enabling me to waste time. It is not called a wheelo, it is called the internet!

1:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Correct! It is a Wheel-O. However, the jingle went:

Put the little wheel here
Ready to play
Move up, move down
Now that's the way
To play Wheel-O
Weeee! It's a lotta fun

2:31 PM  
Blogger Jeffrey Marks said...

The rest of the jingle went:

How many Whee-los can you do?
I bet you I can do as many as you
It makes no difference anyway
'Cause it's so much fun to play!

9:53 PM  

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