Awake and Frowning

Now that it is morning, I have decided to get out of bed and greet the world with a smile. I'm all by myself this morning, so I forwent the smile. It's important to never smile aimlessly while you're in your house alone; neighbors watching you with their binoculars will think you are crazy. If you are alone in the house and you wish to smile aimlessly, I suggest that you do so while holding an open book of Cathy cartoons. Then they'll assume that you're smiling because you're fantasizing about killing Cathy. "Boy, we've all been there," your watchers will mutter.