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Sunday, December 26, 2004

Yankee Ingenuity

It has come to my attention that, as of 11:24 this morning, no one has completed or even half-heartedly contributed to the Wikipedia page regarding "Yankee ingenuity." Surely, reader, you are remiss; surely you intended to contribute! Your Yankee ingenuity-related erudition must not lay stricken by the wayside, disregarded, dismissed, tormented in the stinky pit of neglect! Consider the young Irishman, stalwart in his studies, who can name the capital of Wyoming, who can recite entire passages from Everybody Loves Raymond, who has a vague idea of the many meanings of the word “dugout,” and who once read the Tom Sawyer Cliffs Notes; consider his bewilderment upon discovering Wikipedia’s blank discussion of “Yankee ingenuity!” He meets the Silent Void, the Empty Skull, the Gaping Maw of Wiki! And speaking of silent voids, empty skulls and gaping maws, I will now eat an entire piece of quiche with a single fork.

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