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Thursday, April 07, 2005

Nobody Ate Taft Last Year

Today I noticed a pile of green crap growing in the backyard. At first I thought it was a clump of crabgrass, but it turns out that it's a gigantic piece of stilton from the lawn party I held last October. It was originally carved into a likeness of President William Howard Taft, of blessed memory. Now it's just garbage cheese.

This year I intend to stilton-sculpt either Thomas Aquinas or that intolerable harridan who murdered all those people in the gulags. Can't remember her name at the moment. Hmmm... oh, Virginia Woolf.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

But if the next Pope is a German, surely you will do Liederkranz. Surely.

7:21 PM  
Blogger Attila Girl said...

You are incorrect: it was Gertrude Stein. Do try to stick to the facts.

1:08 AM  
Blogger Esther Wilberforce-Packard said...

Facts, schmacts. Gertrude Stein was the one who strangled those women in Boston. Facts. Pffft. I think I know what I'm talking about here.

8:49 PM  

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