My New Loot, or And From Me You Receive Nothing

In the name of all that is holy and proper, I have heretofore accepted one Ikea Bagn, one Ikea Irma in powder bloo, one Ikea Rens, one Hue stocking, one 100% cotton Charms Blow Pop brand undie, and one Madeline "Winter in Paris" ornament. Reciprocally speaking, I have bestowed nothing but confusion upon all peoples, as I am a rancid old bitch who, amongst other things, thinks nothing of shooting guileless beer cans out of a tree but fears approaching a common bank teller. Or is it that I think nothing of shooting bank tellers out of a tree but fear approaching a guileless beer can? Yes, that sounds reasonable.