I Suffered Loss Today

I lost a dangly jewel from my earring today. I hope it flew from my ear into a heaping plate of ratatouille while I walked through the lunchroom at noon. Few things give me more pleasure than single-handedly introducing an element of dental anguish to a coworker's midday meal.

Under normal circumstances, I would charge a fee for such a lunchtime dental service - if only to cover the cost of the jewel. But these are not normal circumstances. Under normal circumstances, I'd also be at home watching that tedious Oprah cable channel and folding a few bathtowels.