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Saturday, May 07, 2005

Further Proof of My Decay in Exile

I had intended to weep for hours today - had a perfectly vile afternoon, perfectly vile - but the most I could manage was a thin whimper and a few mangled sighs. Reconsidered throwing myself in front of a bus, though at the rate I'm going I'd just bounce off the grill and skin a knee. Hardly seems worth the effort.

Did however have the satisfaction of seeing a pile of shoe-imprinted dog poo on the sidewalk. I wasn't the beast who stepped in it, so perhaps things aren't as sour as I've grown to believe.

4 Comments:

Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Well, since you're able to walk you can get out to smell the flowers -- the skunk cabbage, the corpse plant. Walk carefully through the giant Venus fly-trap...they're always hungry.

6:33 PM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

Maybe you should coat your legs in lead paint. I'm not sure what good this would do, though.

11:07 AM  
Blogger Shane said...

Maybe it was the planning of your weeping that scuppered what could have been a perfectly good spontaneous boo-hoo.

7:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good job.

7:19 PM  

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