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Thursday, May 05, 2005

I am a Simple Sort, but these Turnips, they Make Beautiful Sounds

Normally I am not one to go on about music. Who cares about music? Nobody, or the few. But I recently bought The Caesars Paper Tigers and I cannot not tell you that it is the album that broke the camel's toe. Christ on a stick, it is good. It is so good that I insist on being hit by a city bus this afternoon just so it can be played at my funeral festivities before I grow tired of hearing it. Plus, The Caesars are Swedes, or claim to be, which is a great relief considering that most bands these days refuse to acknowledge their sordid affiliations with our lowly brethren of the vegetable kingdom. Don't know how you play a Farfisa when you have no limbs, but they seem to manage it.


Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

Yes. I understand The Caeser's Salad Trio opens for them.

7:42 PM  
Blogger N2 said...

I would recommend that you stick to Theremin music at your funeral. The theremin is one of the instruments perfectly adapted for play by turnips. Do not, however, allow a canteloupe or a rutabega to play the theremin at your funeral. That would be sacreligious, and very tacky.

9:27 PM  
Blogger Kris said...

You could always surprise everyone and have animals playing the Farfisa at your funeral. That would be surprising, indeed.

5:33 AM  
Blogger Shane said...

An additional dimension - deeply moving too - would be to theme your funeral around turnips. Mourners could throw small veg' into the open grave after your coffin has been lowered. These would 'thump' against the coffin, perhaps creating a 'beat'. Others could simply bear carrier bags loaded with the vegetable. A person from BBC Radio 4's Gardeners' Question Time could make a small speech, if you like.

8:06 AM  
Blogger David said...

Chill on the bus thing. Have a cuppa joe and relax a tad, eh? Song a coupla verses of "O Blessed Holy Caffeine Tree" and you'll calm right down.


12:54 PM  
Blogger David said...

Yeh, so I can't spell "sing"—so?

12:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


8:48 PM  

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