Avant Garde Gothic Condensed Medium, or Trebuchet Narrow, or Some Such Shit
I’ve decided to adopt a new font for my private correspondence. I have also decided that, when the snow recedes, I will find a new stick. My old stick is decrepit. It’s cracked, it has lichen, the end I wrap in flaming kerosene-soaked rags is misshapen. Embarrassing. All I’m saying is, next time we forge a bloodthirsty mob, don’t judge me by my old stick. I’m as angry as the next man, and so help me god my new stick will reflect this.
5 Comments:
To ensure that your new stick properly reflects your anger, I suggest affixing a small mirror. That way, no matter how bloodthirsty the mob, you can adjust your features to match, while subtly adjusting coiffure and make-up.
Not many people can get away with Dior at a lynching, but you do. Faaaaaabulous, darling...
Where do you get kerosene these days. Every time I inquire at the Piggly Wiggly they look at me like I have lost my noodles.
Funny that you ask, because until recently I distilled my own. Then Rafe launched a stock pot full of cats into the room and toppled the whole setup. The cats are fine, etc., and I now order my kerosene direct from India.
I just ask for jet fuel.
Adopting a font is quite fashionable now. We took in a "Franklin Gothic Demi" some time ago and he lends a certain gravitas to our evening soirees. Actually, if you want to borrow some gravitas, I've not got two full buckets...
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