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Monday, June 06, 2005

I Won't

Every time I set foot in the bank, some jaundiced teller tries to bully me into adopting direct deposit for my paychecks. "Just shut up and be grateful I'm bringing you my paychecks at all. Are you on commission? Don't answer that - I'm trying to sleep," I say. Then I shut my eyes and snore a little. Occasionally I admit that much of the work I do is illegal, and that I don't want to sabotage my income by drawing undue attention to my employer through direct banking schemes. Doesn't really matter what I tell the tellers, I suppose, as long as I always remember to place my pocket lint on the ATM for the fairies before I exit the premises.

4 Comments:

Blogger Chris Cope said...

How strange that a teller would suggest this. "Hey, would you like to make me obsolete by using direct deposit?"

12:28 PM  
Blogger Esther Wilberforce-Packard said...

Not only that, but they're offering all takers $75 for simply signing up. Limited time only.

12:48 PM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

I've always wondered about offshore banks. Why can't we have onshore banks that keep their mouths shut. Perhaps the solution is to have Outer Banks Banks.

6:43 PM  
Anonymous Sara said...

On Friday I sighed so deeply that my back cracked.

7:52 PM  

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