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Monday, May 26, 2008

Email

I’ve just completed a ceremonial Skimming of the Email. Puhh. Do I take milk with my porridge? How often do I read Keats? Do I actually campaign for real ale, or do I sit back while others do the footwork? I used to receive such questions with glee, knowing that my answers fuel worlds. I still feel that way, of course, but typing responses has become a hassle. Someone has pried the H, A, R, Tab, and 5 keys from my keyboard. The keyboard itself cracked in April when I whaled Rafe with it. Some good-natured indoor shotgun fire recently damaged my monitor casing and cast a permanent yellow haze over the screen, and my mouse mechanism appears to be clotted with some sort of fruit-based mucosity. Last week I took the side panel off the tower and found, amongst other things, the afikomen. E pur si muove. I can still use the contraption to play Minesweeper, so my weekends remain full.

5 Comments:

Blogger Ivan the Terrible said...

An inspirational story to start the week, Esther - such courage in the face of adversity. Truly you are a Galileo for our times. And whenever you get tired of minesweeper, you can still tell Zoe to "smell de jur"...

Galileo's full name was Galileo Galilei, you know, which some might think was adversity enough for one man. I am so glad that your parents were more imaginative, or at least more drunk, when they named you.

6:35 AM  
Blogger Shane said...

I'm having terrible trouble with pigeons at the moment. Could you spare Rafe and a shotgun one afternoon next week? Say, Wednesday? I can assure you that he would be treat with all the mistrust, revulsion and firmness of hand that keeps a man rounded.

10:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have your H and Tab keys. I don't know who has the A, R, and 5. Probably some asshole.

12:45 PM  
Blogger Chris Cope said...

The five keys were scattered across the far reaches of the universe. It is said that he who reunites them will possess unstoppable power.

2:01 PM  
Blogger OldHorsetailSnake said...

It is nice to know you have something to do. Most people go bananas when their tower pulls a splitsville.

5:15 PM  

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